By: Jana Greene

Disclaimer: This piece is going to piss some people off, mainly because we have gotten to a point in society where different viewpoints are automatically considered to be Salem witch hunt caliber offenses. (Wait, I just used the work “caliber.” *Waits for anti-gun advocates to start boiling the oil in preparation for my demise.*)

You may not agree, and that’s okay. Please remember that this is, in fact, a BLOG, and as such, opinions are expressed! Seems a foregone conclusion, but you’d be surprised…All I can do is speak for myself.

I feel like I have to have that *disclaimer* every time I write anything anymore, which is sad because if you write something, I believe it to be IMPLIED that it’s your p.o.v.

First of all, Women are amazing. We are flippin’ AMAZING.

They are often equal parts fierce-natured and full of softness of spirit, and how exactly did recognizing that become offensive?

Femininity is powerful. We don’t need to be strident and militant to be freaking STRONG. The womanly combination of steely strength and soft-heartedness is what frankly makes he world go round.

As a strong woman confident in her ability and identity and femininity, I find the “smash the patriarchy” movement slightly embarrassing.

Nobody can tell me exactly what’s up with the stridency of this “new feminism.” I get a hodge-podge of ‘equal rights’ or ‘reproductive freedom.’ Vague, generalized discontent and furious anger for rights that they already have. Go sit amongst your sisters in Pakistan for a spell, and then come back and march.

I’ve overcome a LOT in my life. A whole lot. But I am no victim. From one perspective, much of it basically comes down to a huge victim movement.

Oh, hell no. Don’t go associating all feminists with this radicalized faction.

You can dress up as a giant vagina (Google it. Or don’t…) all day long and that proves what? Who are you empowering? I mean, besides vagina costume makers?

Feminism is not a new thing. I grew up in the ’70’s. Old farts and fartresses can spin you a yarn about inequality.

Is there still inequality? Yes. Will wearing a vagina suit and screaming in people’s faces make equality suddenly become a reality across the board? No.

It will make you look like the men that talk about / act like / are referred to by THIER genitals. Let’s all agree that associating oneself with their lady or man parts is only drawing attention to the fact that all God’s chirren got private parts. Which we already knew.

Human beings are so much more than that.

Everyone has obstacles; even men! It’s part of the human condition.

For a period of my own life, I was a single mom working 4 jobs to feed my children with NO support or other help. I worked my ass off and got through it.

Through some miracle tantamount to the Red Sea parting, I made it with sobriety intact. I had neither the time nor the inclination to march and be angry with the patriarchy, because a sister had things to DO.

The truth that many people refuse to see is that you catch more flies with honey than vinegar. You don’t convince the world that you are woman (hear-you-roar….look it up, also from the ’70’s) by gathering in the millions and yelling at he world that you feel has victimized you.

You do it by doing all the things we DO and freaking ROCKING them. Work to change laws. Lobby, if you like.Do what you need to do, girl. But must your cause be so full of bitterness and vitriol?

You can not shame people into changing their minds on what you consider a human rights violation (human rights has become a ridiculously muddy term.)

You change minds by living out your strength every day, going after your dreams like a bulldog, and showing the world what you are made of (ps – it’s not sugar, and spice, and everything nice – it’s STRENGTH) and you change hearts by living out your soft compassion for others – lo, even those you rally against.

The kindness and nurturing? Yeah, those make the world go around too.

I had nothing handed to me, but neither did I feel ‘woe is me’ when things didn’t go my way (which happened a lot, but not because I’m female. Sometimes life is unfair and sucks.)

I also raised two extremely strong women, many times all in my own. Women who would (and have) marched, and I would not want to deny them the right to do so. To each her own, as they say. Ain’t no shame in marching. When you scream hysterically to news agencies from said marches, honey…no. You can’t convince the world with hysteria. Take it from an old broad.

But I would like to tell the citizenry of this good world this – not all women feel victimized. Not all FEMINISTS feel victimized.

And not all feminists hate men. I ADORE my husband, who just happens to be a white male (gasp!) and is the finest human being I’ve ever known. When he married me, he took on raising 2 additional teen girls in addition to his own daughter. Bravest man I know, helping give 3 strong-willed daughters good lives, and we are both flummoxed at why his gender/race is now the butt of so many jokes. Talk about intolerance!

Men are not the problem; small-minded people are the problem. Are some of these small-minded people men? Of course. But making BROAD, SWEEPING GENERALIZATIONS about any one people group is, um…small-minded.

Thanks for letting me share these thoughts. I know some will close their minds before they read past the title, but can we at least try to understand the points of view of others with open-mindedness?

I dream of a world where human beings are loved by other human beings without nastiness being necessary to assert their views.

You may say I’m a dreamer, but I’m not the only one.